I define myself as “Beautiful Ugly” - since I believe our journey defines who we are, as a person. Thus, I’m forced to look upon myself with this moniker.
I worked hard to create a feminine presentation that society finds relatively “pretty” but was often made to feel despicable during that process. Along this same voyage I discovered beauty in places I least expected and found ugliness in recognized sanctuaries of love.
Thus: this Beautiful Ugly girl was born.
Lots of people could aptly be defined as “beautiful ugly” - I’m one of them. We’re all beautiful people - if we can just find enough courage & vision to look beneath a varied surface.
Perhaps we’re missing a limb, carry extra weight, possess large ears, dress differently, or don’t have the most common sexual orientation. Most of us are made to feel ugly because we’re different. We’re stared at, ridiculed - even attacked - for simply being who we are.
In many ways it’s feels like I’m now only a young adult - building my projects in business, the arts and love for the first time. Fundamentally? As a woman? I’m guessing I’m probably about 30-years-old. Lots of people find my pace exhausting. Alas, I don’t feel I have enough time left to accomplish all I want - but I’m gonna’ try! It’s actually a rather fascinating experience to see this world through three completely different sets of eyes:
A white, anglo-saxon, protestant “straight” male from small-town America.
An obviously metro-queer, androgynous creature transitioning to female
Finally: a woman - with a fairly prototypical female existence.
How the world sees you was very different in each of these circumstances. It also impacted how I viewed the same landscape. Alas, the person underneath was always exactly the same.
What is beauty? What is ugliness?
I believe their but two sides of the same coin seen from singular vantage points & varied perception based upon different sets of eyes. They are one - they are the same.